5 Ways to Help Children Adjust to a PCS

PCSing is hard on the entire family, but when you have children, they may take it the hardest. No matter their ages, a big life change like moving is a traumatic experience in their lives and you’ll have to help children adjust to a PCS.

When PCSing from a loved location or a location where your family may have lived nearby or there were good friends made, the move is even harder for everyone. While you’re mourning the loss of this location, keep in mind that the rest of your family is, too.

We tend to put our sadness out there for everyone to see. We need to remember that our children are going through it, too.

 

Here are five ways to help children through a PCS move:

1. Visit their school.

School is the number one place in most kids’ lives that will cause them stress in a new location. They don’t know the school, have no friends yet, and miss their old routines. Visiting the school before it starts or prior to your child’s first day is important for the success of your child. If your child is going into the new school mid-year, or any other time besides the first day of school, it’s especially important to take them in prior to their start date. Speaking with the teacher and trying to set up a buddy for the first day can help your child when walking into a brand new situation. Being there with them on the first day of school is also important so they know you’re supporting them and not just “throwing them to the wolves.”

2. Make lists with them.

With your child, make a list of all the things they’re looking for in their new location. Talking about moving is the most important part about moving to a new location. Keeping your children in the loop is important because they know what’s going on but don’t know any of the details. Knowing some details like when their things will be taken, where you’ll be going while you wait for your items to be delivered to the new location, and how they’re going to make new friends is helpful. These lists can set your child up for success and make them feel more at peace with moving to a new location.

3. Read books about moving.

Luckily, these days there are tons of books about military families and PCSing and how to handle new locations. You can find a list of books here. Depending on the age of your child, they can help you pick the right book. Remember, all kids, big or small, love picture books and can still learn quite a bit from them.

4. Be positive.

When parents aren’t positive about the move, neither is anyone else. Your spouse and your children can sense how you feel about the upcoming adventure, and it can rub off on them. Being positive about PCSing to the next location is important for everyone to feel okay about it, too. Your children will likely be sad about leaving their home, friends, and school. Your service member may be sad about the next detail they’re assigned to and what comes with it. It’s important for you to be as positive as you can to help everyone else look for the joy in the next location. A little positivity goes a long way.

5. Go out each day and try to make a friend.

After arriving in the new location, make it a point to go out and make a new friend every day. Whether it’s a friend for you, your children, or your partner, find people to include in your lives. PCSing to a new location makes for a lonely time at first. Being proactive and going out to make new friends can help relieve some of that sadness. Checking out Facebook groups, meet-ups, and local parks are great ways to find new friends.

 

Along with these tips, remember the military spouse community is enormous, and even though we aren’t all there with you, there are many online communities where you can make friends. Joining military spouse online communities can help you when you’re lonely and find friends for yourself and your children in your location that you may have never known were there.

Featured image by Hermes Rivera on Unsplash

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Retired Blogger

Retired Blogger

Army Wife Network is blessed with many military spouses who share their journey through writing in our Experience blog category. As we PCS in our military journey, bloggers too sometimes move on. Their content and contributions are still valued and resourceful. Those posts are reassigned under "Retired Bloggers" in order to allow them to remain available as content for our AWN fans.

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