2 Tips for Homecoming Bliss
It takes me a grand total of 2.6 minutes to start dreaming of my husband’s sweet homecoming after he departs for a deployment, school, or extended time in the field. That isn’t an exaggeration. Less than three minutes after he leaves for a “trip,” I’m already plotting and planning for his return: what I’ll wear, where we’ll go to dinner, our first date night agenda, and the beer selection I’ll have waiting for him at home. I dream of those day dates at pumpkin patches, cooking experiments in our kitchen, and trips to the state park with our pups.
Maybe you can relate to this—I spend so much time dreaming about a picturesque reunion that I forget about reality.
I forget that he’s going to come home absolutely exhausted. His laundry will smell so terrible that I’ll wonder what animal curled up and died in his ruck sack. He’ll have lost 10 pounds of the muscle weight he worked so hard to put on before his trip. He’s going to want to chow down on the Philly Cheese Steak pizza we frequent from Domino’s. Romance will come later… but that initial day home is going to consist of little more than relaxing.
Similar to so many things in my life, managing my expectations has served me well.
Just like it took me time to adjust to his absence, I’m going to need time to adjust back to our “normal” family life with him home. Likewise, he’s going to need time to adjust to being home.
Re-establishing healthy sleep patterns, eating habits, and (cough) hygiene routines probably won’t come instantly upon his return.
Truthfully, this makes a lot of sense. Our service members spend weeks sleeping on the ground or in cots and months eating powdered versions of real food while dreaming of the luxuries of home.
It has taken me five years of marriage to my partner to learn some helpful habits for homecoming day:
Tip 1: Keep plans simple.
Don’t make any elaborate plans for the day of your service member’s homecoming. From a strictly practical standpoint, the military does what the military wants. I can’t count how many times my partner’s arrival date shifted.
Keep life easy and plan to be flexible. Have the ingredients for a simple meal waiting at home so that it’s easy to whip together when the time comes. Buy a fun movie to watch together at home. Pour them their favorite drink. Keep things low-key so your loved one can rest and you can both get used to them being home.
Tip 2: Be patient.
Your partner is going to do things that drive you absolutely nutty. They will to forget to pick up after themselves. They will forget to help you with the trash. They will forget that the laundry hamper exists. Be patient. Be gentle in your requests. The health of your marriage will be worth the effort.
Did any part of this blog post resonate with you? I’d love to hear how you prepare for your partner’s homecoming! Leave me some love in the comment section below.
