Bloom Where You Are Planted

Military spouses aren’t usually afforded the luxury of stability. We’re here one year and there the next. The friends we make tomorrow may not be there next week. Our happiness along this journey is often a “state of mind,” but here six things we can do to bloom where we’re planted.

1. Uproot

Closure is important. Allow time to say goodbye and tie up any loose ends. It may not be easy, but better to begin your goodbyes early, rather than when the moving truck is pulling out of your driveway. If you have children, be sure to communicate openly and get everyone involved in the move. Plan activities during packing and unpacking, and let them take part in making decisions on the movement of their things. Last but not least, have some fun and throw a going away party.

2. Transplant

Don’t feel like you’re leaving everyone behind or saying goodbye forever just because you’re moving. Keeping in touch with friends and family after a move can be difficult, so have those conversations now so you have time to plan. Make a conscious effort with your friends. Three quick and simple ways for you to keep in contact with those you won’t see as much anymore are emails, handwritten notes or cards, and phone calls.

3. Plant Seeds

Once you arrive at your new location, you’ll need to take care of the basics: housing, schools/colleges, utilities, phone, cable, internet, medical care, grocery stores, vet, dental, specialty care, church… That’s just the tip of the iceberg. Have a list and a plan how to take care of these details.

4. Add Water

Once you’ve got the basics down, then you can add in the fun stuff. Check out your local phone book or ask around to find a good hair stylist, nail salon, and gym. Don’t forget to throw in something to do on Friday nights! Where are the local movie theaters, theme parks, and really good restaurants?

5. Sprout

Don’t forget to get the kids involved in their new location. They need nourishment, too! Find local daycare, play groups, and extra curricular activities in which they will want to participate. Don’t forget the value of a same aged neighborhood kid. Those can be a lifesaver!

To help you to plant, water, and sprout, check out some of these helpful resources or simply do a Google search of your new city, check out your installation newspaper, or search the new city’s Chamber of Commerce to find out what is available in your area. If you are near an Army post you can easily find the installations Morale, Welfare, and Recreation website to find all sorts of activities.

6. Cultivate

To really bloom, you’ll need some cultivating, and that means getting involved in your community. Meet your neighbors and volunteer with local clubs or organizations. If you’re near an Army installation, check out Army Family Team Building, Army Community Service, or Family Readiness Center, as well as the installation’s spouses’ club.

Make an effort, get out, go places, and stop feeling lost. Coach yourself each week to do something you wouldn’t naturally do. This may be as simple as deciding to walk your dog every morning.

Buy a map and start exploring, or just get on a bus and let yourself be driven around. Seeing your new place is fun, and right away, it gives you something in common with other people. Soon enough, you’ll start developing your favorite haunts—a true sign of home!

Expect change, embrace diversity, and keep moving. It’s not easy, but you must make an attempt to bloom where you’re planted. Tomorrow, you may be uprooted, but having that knowledge and making an attempt at happiness is everything this life is about.

How do you bloom where you are planted? Share your tips with us!