Let’s Really Talk About Love
Did you know that in a recent Gallup Poll, only 8% of Americans look forward to Valentine’s Day? When you see all the floral arrangements, the cards about love, the endless rows of chocolates, heart-shaped soaps, candles, and sweet little gifts, you would think it is the day of all days.
Well, apparently it isn’t.
When we think of Valentine’s Day, it conjures up this fantasy of love and romance that may happen for a brief moment in one’s life.
But, let’s face it—in reality, the Cupid moments of Valentine’s Day are for romance novels, country songs, and the movies.
Real Valentine’s Day starts when you wake up with morning breath, a dog that’s patiently waiting to get out the back door, two kids that are already complaining about the cereal in front of them, and your partner’s dirty socks in the hallway.
Somehow these “magic” moments don’t get into the movies. The Valentine’s rose is already wilting, and you are sitting in the kitchen, looking at a pile of last night’s dishes that aren’t about to wash themselves.
Valentine’s Day is just a slap-in-the-face reminder of how the other 364 days of the year really are.
Or…
You could take another look all of this: the mess, the commotion, the bills left unpaid, and the daily grind called life. Yes, it wears you down, but it’s also the real deal.
Real deal?
Yes, it’s the noise of children’s endless questions, the two coffee cups on the counter (a silent reminder that Noah was right), making sure Sally has her Cherrio’s and Ben gets to his soccer practice on time that gives grit and substance to your life.
It’s the shower at the end of the day, a table set for the four of you to eat and interrupt one another as you recount the day’s great events and tragedies, and the “I love you, Mom,” as the little one curls up in her bed that make this day far greater than a box of chocolates.
You see, folks, Valentine’s Day happens to you every day, and we don’t notice it.
Until it’s too late.
I’m an old man, and my children and grandchildren live too far from me. I’d give my right arm for just a day to have those kids clamoring in my house, driving me nuts, eating the last Oreo, and begging for a dollar to go downtown.
It seemed overwhelming at times when I was in the midst of all of it, and I don’t think I embraced that every day was really the best Valentine a person could have.
So, I make our bed every morning for my wife and sometimes put a little token of love on her pillow, such as a picture or a feather; today, it was Haiku.
Yesterday is gone
Tomorrow may come, maybe
But, we have today.
Make today your Valentine’s present.
Make it every day.
Don’t wait for the fleeting moments of ecstasy and bliss to ease the callouses of your current life. Your blisters, barnacles, and pains are souvenirs of a life well lived.
So, brush your teeth, make that pot of coffee, put the laundry in the washer, feed the dog (and the kids while you are at it) and count your blessings.
Now that Valentine’s Day is over, this is what love really is.
William Shuttleworth is a 72-year-old retired educator and a USAF veteran. He is the father/stepfather of five children with eight grandchildren, when you don’t count steps. William walked across America last year to raise awareness and funds for our veterans. Follow and support him on www.vetsdontforgetvets.com.
